Sunday afternoon Adam, Abel, and I finished watching a sermon. There was an illustration in it about inviting God to be apart of your plans- even if they already include Him. God longs to be intimate with us, be included in the journey and not just sought for the plan itself. I was moved by this story.
Shortly after, Adam helped me work on some labor exercises for spinning babies into the correct fetal position. For as long as we have been belly mapping his position- around 22 weeks, he’s been in the same position which was head down but left facing instead of right, which was the same place as Abel was in which resulted in a disheartening hospital induction at 42 weeks. I tried to keep positive this time despite the circumstances looking similar.
At 35 weeks, I started chiropractic care with a Webster certified chiropractor, who is there to help prepare your body for optimal birthing alignment and also getting baby into a good position for labor and delivery. At 37 weeks, I started acupuncture to also help my body prepare and make the delivery easier. I had started homeopathy shortly after, and we were doing everything we could to rotate him.
Just after the sermon, I drank some pineapple juice to help soften my cervix. I got on the birth ball and worked on opening my hips. For weeks, when I would wake up with Braxton Hicks in the middle of the night, I would have to remind myself not to tense up, to breathe and trust my body. My gut response would be to fight it, but I started using Christian hypnobirthing and reframed my mindset.
Later that night, we settled the kids in bed and it got quiet in the house. Adam was out around 8pm, and I laid there not ready to fall asleep. I was still thinking about the sermon and felt an unrelenting urge to ask our online friends and community to pray WITH us, to invite you along into the journey of asking God for this miracle. I know where there are 2 or more are gathered, God is with us! He hears our prayers and sometimes all He wants is an invitation into the intimate thoughts we have… He wants to know and hear our requests. If I’m honest, sometimes I feel strange asking God for things, especially when I feel like He already knows my desires, but I felt this blessing and miracle wasn’t just for me, but also all those who had been awaiting this redeeming birth story with us. So I invited you.
I asked for 4 specific things:
That he would turn with ease into perfect birth position
that the Lord keeps Adam and I both at peace
that he would come quickly
and without intervention.
The 3rd request- to come quickly, if I’m honest, I KNEW what I was asking and was nearly afraid to ask, it but felt like it needed to be in there, like God was challenging me to believe in the details of this this prayer.
I saw the prayers pouring in through the comments and DMs and then I placed my hand on my stomach and began commanding that Elijah turn in Jesus’ name. Immediately he began moving rapidly in my stomach- not just kicks and punches but I prayed until I fell asleep.
Abel woke me up at 3am, as he has been since this round of teething a few weeks ago. I soothed him back asleep and realized I was cramping. I tried to ignore it, because I had been having prodromal labor for about 2 weeks and nothing was productive. But then I realized these cramps were coming in waves and a pattern, so I stayed awake just in case and tried to relax. I knew when I had the urge to go the bathroom (sorry TMI) it wasn’t "nothing", and they were real cramps. I got up did my business and noticed the bloody show was commencing, very faintly. I knew this could mean we were hours or days away from birth.
At 3:45am I started documenting in pictures (just my thoughts).
At 4:10am I texted my midwives. I wasn’t quite sure if things were truly happening or not. They told me to eat, hydrate, and REST.
I made my way to the kitchen and tried to figure out what to eat that I could hold down and keep me full. I tried making a ham sandwich. I recorded it just in case I didn’t get a chance to make another update. For some odd reason I grabbed a cutting board and I have no idea why, but I didn’t even realize it til watching the video back.
I couldn’t make the sandwich. I was on the floor and moaning. I didn’t want to fight the waves but I also didn’t want to be super loud but I was in real pain. I said out loud “I can do anything for 60 seconds.”
It was 4:30am and I knew I needed to wake up Adam, because they weren’t slowing down. It didn’t seem like a false alarm at this point. I told him to take his time, but I was sure something was happening. He got up and started getting ready and knocking things off my list. I told him I needed him to finish making my sandwich and refill my electrolyte water.
I went back to the toilet. If you don’t know, the toilet is the perfect place to dilate, it also helps naturally release things because… well hello that’s what you do there. And there’s no messy clean up 😅. It’s the only place I ever felt relief in the hospital with my first labor.
At 4:40am I checked in with my midwives letting them know I was having trouble getting off the toilet because the waves were coming in every 5 minutes. They had me download a contraction app to share with them in real time. I sent several their way to give them the pattern and sure enough they were 5 minutes apart and a minute long. But I desperately wanted to shower if I was going to be in labor all day. I had him start the shower and tried to get undressed.
I called my friend Brittanie who was coming to take photos for us and is also a doula. At 4:44am she started getting ready and making her way to us from 45 minutes away.
I got in the shower at 5:07am and I couldn’t stand. I got down on all fours. The water helped with the intensity of the contractions. I was just worried about having him on the floor and it being slick. I was going to try and make it back to the toilet to help get myself dressed.
After analyzing the numbers they wanted me to work through some miles circuit exercises to try get him to adjust his position. I had Adam create 2 stations with chucks pads and prep the bed with a shower curtain under our sheets.
As I was drying off, Adam was having a moment about having his hair freshly cut 😆😅 which he said he would weeks ago. He’s adamant about his hair being perfect, and I just laughed at him thinking about how ridiculous he was. That laughter gave me the fortitude I needed to get out!
I got out and sat on the toilet while Adam grabbed my clothes. It was hard to talk. I didn’t realize I was in transition. I put my bra on and then my underwear, thinking I had a while. I lined it with a thick pad and immediately was losing all kinds of mess. Adam went to turn on my birth playlist in our room, but I couldn’t communicate to him how to find it so I went to pick out a song on my phone while he grabbed my headphones.
Abel was up at this point, and Adam had grabbed him breakfast to eat in bed while I labored. I couldn’t bear the headphones because they were making me sweat so I pulled my phone out and of 29 songs, Adam and I selected the same song at the same time “Wait on You” and I had it playing in the bathroom while he had it on in the bedroom. Abel was worshipping in bed.
I felt pushy but kept reminding myself not to push and breathe. I wanted so badly to experience FER- fetal ejection reflex. In natural birth moms who know to listen to their body and not fight the contraction can experience this phenomenon where the body naturally releases baby with no effort from mom- which means she never even has to push. It’s incredible what our bodies can do!
I had Adam put on the tens unit to counter the pain. I barely got it on.
I felt the urge to push and I tensed up. Though I was spacey, I felt him rotate and descend in the birth canal and I hollered at Adam “Uhhhh something just happened.” The ring of fire began and immediately he was crowning. Adam yelled “the sack” and I was like WHAT?!!! I felt immediate relief. I was in the home stretch and felt NO pain. I was calm.
I sat there on the toilet, awaiting his head to drop in my hands. Adam was in disbelief. He called the midwives and told them baby’s head was out and was coming. Adam grabbed a towel and prepared to catch him. My body pushed his entire head out with ease. And a few seconds later, Adam caught his entire body and raised him to my chest at 5:39am.
He told me his cord was wrapped around his neck and I didn’t hesitate to grab it and pull it over his head out of instinct. I was calm and at total peace. No more pain. Less than 2 hours of laboring and he was here. The placenta followed with ease.
Abel walked in and Adam scooped him up. I had worried so much about how Abel would be frantic, worried about me during labor and he was golden. Adam was running off adrenaline and was so proud to have delivered our son. It was just us and it was perfect.
At 5:40am I told Adam to start recording and taking photos.
5 minutes went by and Brittanie arrived. 5 minutes later our midwife arrived and helped me clean up and get into bed. Our other midwife made it shortly after.
We joked for a few months about having to be prepared in case I had a quick labor but we knew we needed to consider and prepare for that.
All that prep work, all the things in all the places, all the checklists, the twinkle lights, the birth pool… and all we needed was each other, a toilet, and a towel. We make plans, God laughs.
I can tell you that my experience with our home birth was far different than at the hospital. It was redeeming for sure. It was everything I wanted it to be and we prayed for together. And I’m so glad you were here for it, even though we didn’t get to share the experience with you in the moment. It’s not lost on me that every single one of you who prayed were part of this blessing and miracle. It happened in God speed, just like we prayed, with peace, without intervention and with ease.
2.5 hours total labor time
Less than1.75 hours of active labor
0 cervical checks
0 hip squeezes
0 pushes
Free Unassisted Birth at Home
I’m grateful for Abel’s birth and that it allowed me to experience the hardships and sit and sympathize greatly with moms who need to be advocated for with birth choices and freedom. But on the other side, I am equally as grateful to experience the pain free birth I longed for in the peace of our home without stress. It may not have been in a beautiful pool with twinkling lights, but it was every bit the dream I had in my heart for what was important and what mattered most. And now, I can rest and heal at home, surrounded by my family and adapting and adjusting to living as a family with 4 littles!
Thank you
Adam: Thank you to my husband for your confidence and trust in me to birth at home. Thank you for your support and your incredible heart to jump in and help me deliver our son! I'm so proud of you. We finally got our redeeming birth babe! I am so grateful for your help while I rest and recover- I could not have done it without you!
Carrie and Paislie (Hatched Midwives): Thank you for your support to birth these two boys. From one extreme to another, you carry women in the most vulernable and precious times in their life. Thank you for empowering mamas and reminding us what we are capable of. Thank you for incredible care and allowing us to become our own advocates.
Brittanie (Sovereign Birth Doula): Thank you so much for your encouragement these past few weeks and for capturing and documenting this incredible moment in our lives.
And... the question everyone is dying to know... whatever happened to that sandwich?
After the big kids were picked up by Adam's parents for a day, we settled into bed and watched the Inauguration and I got to enjoy my sandwich... finally!
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